Miracles are alive and well

Let me just start out by saying how grateful I am that God has a plan for us, and that his plan for me is perfect and better than I could have ever come up with on my own.
I believe we have free will, but that Heavenly Father also puts us through trials and obstacles in life that sometimes prevent us from getting or doing what we want, impeding upon our free will.. if you will. Although it is so hard to see why, I believe there is a reason. I feel it is ALWAYS the best thing for US at the time, and in the big picture will help us to be better, help ME to be a better me.
Lets start 5 years ago, when I married the most wonderful man. I had wanted to have children ALL my life, I was born to be a mother, I just knew it. I wanted to get started on my family right away.
4 years ago... We had been trying to have children for a year, and decided we needed a little fertility help. We began going to a fertility specialist only to find out that BOTH of us had infertility issues. We were told that is was very unlikely that we would ever be able to get pregnant on our own, without help. I began taking fertility drugs, and immediately felt my body telling me that it was not the right thing to do. I stopped and began down the road of acceptance that I may not ever be able to conceive children.
a little over 3 years ago... I had made it to that place, finally, that is SO hard to get to. I was ready to accept that I would not be able to conceive a child. I was lifted up with the support of my Heavenly Father and savior Jesus Christ, my family and Husband, and began contemplating adoption as a way to begin our family.
A little while later Mike also had the feeling that we needed to go the route of adoption, that it was in the cards for us and that this would bring us children and more happiness and joy than we could ever imagine.
Shortly there after... Gabriel Robert Jones was born to the most amazing Angel Mother, Phoenix, and she did the most Christ like thing a human being can do.. she entrusted him to a family, to us, so that he could have a Mother and Father and have more than she as a young teen could give him. He made our hearts swell and we loved him from the moment we laid eyes on him.
A little over a year and a half ago... We felt the desire to have another child. I was afraid to open up my mind to trying to conceive naturally again, and was torn between trying to get pregnant (and having to give up again) or go the route of adoption again. Mr. Jones and I prayed, and both, individually, got the impression that there was a special child out there that was meant to be in our family. That needed Gabriel as an elder brother... that we needed to adopt again. We were SO excited to move forward with our family.
A little over a year ago... Malia Jones was born to yet again one of the most amazing 17 year old girls I had ever met, our second Angel Mother, Kara. She gave me the little girl I had always wanted, I love her so much. She brings light and joy into all of our lives and her and Gabe LOVE each other beyond words.
About 6 months ago... I got the distinct impression my family was complete! That we would not adopt again. I felt a sense of peace with the beautiful children we had been blessed with. I felt so much joy and love for them and felt that we had completed our family. I did not hope for having a child naturally, I was happy, we were happy. I looked back and realized that I had become what I thought would be so hard to become just a few years back, at peace and full of gratitude for Heavenly Father's plan for us to adopt our children, and not to conceive them ourselves. I felt so blessed that we had been chosen to be adoptive parents. That we got to have our children come to us in such a special way, and I had no desire to ever have it any other way than the road we had taken to get to that point. We had two beautiful amazing children that had come to us in such a miraculous way.
Just this month... A miracle. It seems God had other plans for our little family. I am PREGNANT! Now, I know this may fall on ears that have joy and some a little sadness from hearing this news. For those who also have not been able to have children naturally, I know. And all I can say is I am as grateful as a human can possibly be for this miracle. I appreciate that Heavenly Father has answered my prayers, and that He has decided that it is now my time, that now is His time (which is SO much more important than my time actually) to bless us with this miracle. For those of you who have or can have children, yours is a miracle as well, cherish it as much as you can. There are so many who never have this miracle happen to them. Be sensitive to those around you whom you know are struggling. Know that mention of child birth or pregnancy can pain them at times, it is one of the hardest trials a woman can go through.
Now, my whole point, or my main thought that I wanted to share. I am now in the future, five years into our marriage, into my wonderful blessed little family. I am looking back at my pain, suffering, difficulty accepting that I could not have children. And then my joy and happiness and realization that there was something special in store for us, two somethings, Gabe and Malia. And now, seeing that there is at least one more child, that was waiting for us to go through ALL of that, to ensure that these two that I already have, came to OUR family. I don't understand it all, God's plan for me that is, but that is ok. I trust Him, have faith in Him, and know that he knows me, Becky, and loves me more than I could ever know. And, looking back, I can see that He knows better than I do. Yes, He put me through that difficult time, puts us all through difficult times, but I feel this is why: Because how much greater can we understand joy and happiness if we have been through such sorrow and struggle? How much greater our joy will be than those who have seen no different. In other words, we have to understand pain and suffering to truly appreciate and understand joy. To have the most joy we can possibly have. And what Father would not want that for His children? We go through trials, to more appreciate the joy and miracles in our lives.
I have know this concept for many years, but this experience has made me understand it even more. I will appreciate and enjoy every moment of this miracle. I will never take it for granted because I KNOW what it is like to NOT have the choice to create your own child. I have experienced that sorrow, and now my heart is overflowing with joy at the news that we are to have a baby.
We will keep you all posted as we get any new news. Please keep us in your prayers as it is still early on. I cherish all of my friendships and loved ones. You mean the world to me, and I am SO excited to go through this with all of you by our sides.